My life is in a mess right now..

I don't know how to pick up the pieces and move on with my life..
From young, I've been someone who is very dependent on the people around me.
And right now, I feel as if I lost someone that I love, trust and rely on the most.
I feel so fucking lost. I've never felt this way before. I've never felt
so hopeless towards my life before. I don't know what to do.. I don't know who
to talk to.. All I want is you. I want to talk to you. I want to spend time with you.
I want the old you. I want the old us. I want us to be happy again. Why did you have
to change? Why? I don't know who are you. I don't understand you anymore. Have you
forgotten all the things you said to me when we just got together? Can you bear to
just let everything fall apart, after all the thick and thin we've gone through?
Why aren't you doing anything to salvage our relationship? Why am I the only one
getting hurt? Why can you still be so happy without me in your life? Why? Have you
forgotten about us? Have you forgotten about our first date? Don't you ever think
about them? Don't you ever want to go back to the past again? When will this ever end?